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I have a hard time getting to sleep without the whir of a fan or white noise.

"Silence is deafening." I like that cliché. It’s particularly true when you’re at a low point; the mind becomes an echo chamber for your worst voices.

“Evangeline” is about that frazzled place at the edge of sleep, and banging your head against a figurative wall that separates you from the people you’ve hurt. Oh, plus the blue light of television at 3am.

Musically, I have to give a shout-out to Anders Bergstrom for his drumming which brought all the pieces of this song together while the rhythm shifts kind of diaphanously between the verse and chorus and back again.

lyrics

I count the walls
I’m counting sheep
I’m counting on the pills to get me back to sleep
‘cause that tired voice is on repeat
I hear it speak the vows I spoke but couldn’t keep
And when it’s late I say your name
The old familiar song’s refrain, Evangeline
Could you forgive a man who finally broke you in the places
Where you always seemed to bend
While I’m still awake on my side of the silence we both must endure
And you’re only there when I dream
But I can’t fall asleep anymore

So I leave the TV on at night
It’s nice to hear the voices and I like the light
Oh come what may and come what might
From all that might’ve been and what I can’t rewrite
And on and on with what remains
Of bitter ends but all the same, Evangeline
I’ll always wish the best for you
I hope you know I hope that every wish you make comes true
While I’m still awake on my side of the silence we both must endure
And you’re only there when I dream
But I can’t fall asleep anymore

I can’t sleep at all anymore
The water’s deep but I’m stuck on the shore
Sometimes all my best intentions leave me at my worst
I went and wished upon a star that’s falling in reverse

credits

from The Great Make Believer, released March 11, 2016

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Chris Robley Lewiston, Maine

"Chris Robley is at the top of his game with his new work." - KCRW

Maine-based singer/songwriter and award-winning poet Chris Robley (formerly from Portland, Oregon) performs orchestral indie-pop and fractured folk reminiscent of John Lennon, John Vanderslice, Harry Nilsson, and Joe Henry.

His poetry has appeared in POETRY Magazine, Prairie Schooner, and many other journals. ... more

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